It's never easy to say goodbye

Last Thursday I buried my 91 year old grandfather.    he and Mamaw had celebrated their 71st wedding anniversary a week earlier.   SEVENTY ONE YEARS!!!.   when you  consider that today, it is normal to be married and divorced 2 or 3 times before you are 50 the fact that they stayed together  for nearly 3/4 of a century says something remarkable.

I was lucky.   I grew up knowing 3 out of 4 grandparents.  I even had a close relationship with all of them. but even so,  even with the daily updates that got passed around among the cousins and the siblings on Facebook and via text message on his  continued downward spiral, it was  not easy getting the call at 630 Monday morning as my father and I pulled out of my driveway  about to head down to OH to what turned out to be  saying our goodbyes.

Papaw was larger than life.   cantankerous, ornery and always ready to pick on ya.  and we ate it up.  he was one of those people that shunned organized religion and refused to go to Church.   and yet he was a better Christian than  90% of those folks that proclaim themselves to be one.   he was ALWAYS helping out others, even as he himself started requiring assistance.

as we sat around the house trying to figure out what to add to the coffin, we got to thinking about what made him Papaw to us.

first thing: the crossword puzzle for the day he died.   he did it every morning, even  as he got too old to see the small print.   he just made somebody else read the clues to him.   and argued with ya until you conceded he was right.   then was the Cincinnati Reds pennant.   we learned VERY early on that when the Red's played, you stayed  OUT of his line of sight on the TV and you damn well better NOT be interrupting him for anything less than dinner.  or Euchre.

speaking of Euchre.   he played that game ALL.THE.TIME.   if you could keep up with him, you were golden.   we also found out, as we went through his deck of cards, that we had all been playing by Darby rules all our lives.   which  looked NOTHING like the official rules.  

In one hand we placed a stogie as he had taken to smoking them more and more after he gave up the pipe, which was in the other hand.  the cherry tobacco from his pipe is the one smell I remember most as a little kid at Papaw's house.

He was wearing his Fire Department Chief's uniform and his Masonic apron and his VFW cover, representing all the service to others he performed all his life.  if we could have found a pair of dolphins, that would have gone in too, to represent his days in the Navy during WW2 on submarines.

Throughout the week, there was much inappropriate humor from a cousin or two, our way of dealing.   Darby-isms were quoted ad infintum.   ones like... "take all you want, but eat all you take" and " three full bites before you say you don't like something".  gasps of horror at the frying pan with only a bare film of grease in the bottom as opposed to an inch thick.   Made the eggs taste better, he said.

and then Wednesday came.   and we had to face the coffin.   at least he looked like Papaw,and not pissed at the world like my mother did at hers.  Only then did I start crying uncontrollably.  but it was quick, and we got ourselves under control, mostly.  my Brother and my cousin, the other two Firefighters, debated the relative merits of  a windbreaker as Dress uniform.

Thursday was a bitch.   another trip to the church for a private viewing and ceremony, this time from the VFW Honor Guard.  and then off to the cemetery.   which is located directly behind the house.   all day Wednesday we watched them dig the whole and erect the tent.   well, those of us who  could stand to look out the back door.  now the Church was maybe 3 blocks away too so the whole transit time was 5 minutes.. and that included everybody climbing in, buckling up then getting in line behind the hearse.

at the entrance to the ceremony, the four of us in the car  completely broke down.   Crossed Ladder Trucks with flag displayed.  didn't stop there either.   we were Saluted by sideboys on our way in to the tent.   then the FD issued a Last call over the radio.   yeah, Joe( the cousin, )and Brian (the brother) gave up any pretense of manly control at that point.   Me? I had managed to get semi calm.   and then came Taps and the 21 Gun salute.  Last time I heard that?   my mother's funeral 12 years ago.   NOT the most pleasant of memories, you know?

Then it was over and we went back to the Church where the Ladies Aux fed us.   and we reminisced some more.  Friday night, the cousins that were left.. me, Laura and Joe(well he doesn't count, he's local)  went and hoisted a beer in Darby's name at the Hofbrau down by the Levee on the OH River.  He would have approved.

Yo. WTH is Spring?!

seriously.   it SNOWED last night.   granted nothing stuck but it's bloody freezing  out there.  Dear March: you came in like a lion.. you are supposed to go out like a lamb.   Pay attention dammit!

my poor Squidly dude.   working 18 hour days 7 days a week keeping the everyday crap  plugging along while everybody else  helps out with relief efforts.  It's been rough on him, in many ways, and I feel bad I can't be there in person to help.   June can't come soon enough.

More Adventures with Unaccompanied orders/home ownership.  Smoke Detectors.   Necessary evil.   My Brother is a firefighter so I know all about their necessity and how you should change their batteries every 6 months/changing of the clocks.  Last year they went off at 0200 (seriously I think they are PROGRAMMED to go off in the middle fo the night to make sure somebody is home to hear it)  not a week before John.. my lovely 6 Ft tall husband with no neck issues who can reach the ceiling on the step ladder.. left for Okinawa.    ( and yes I swear HE planned it that way too!)

at least this time they waited until 0730.   Thanks for that.   unfortunately, last year?    yeah I busted the swingy door thingy that is supposed to lock shut and keep the battery  attached to the leads.   so it has to be taped shut.  and if you don't get the tape  just.so.  it doesn't latch.   and an hour later the bastard goes off again cuz it cannot detect the battery.

and uh WHY do I have one that is battery only while every OTHER one in the house is wired directly?! hmmm??!.   and that doesn't even count the odd ball one that uses these 2 midget batteries I have never seen before and have no idea WTF it is supposed to detect.   CO1?   Heat?   yet another smoke detector?

and yes I tried last year to leave the battery only one un batteried since I have a bunch of others but it gets most snippy with you when you leave it unplugged too long.   and I can't fully remove it anyway.  was tempted to get a set of wire cutters.. but with my luck I would have blown up the house.

at least I got outta the house yesterday.   card making day with Wonder Amanda.  she took a few basic supplies and made a bunch of different cards/projects.   and dammit now I want that stupid stamp set with the bird.  luckily I already had the embossing folders she used.. well the frame one and I have a close substitute for the basketweave one.   and depending how ambitious I get I may post pics although they are already posted in several other places.  oh yeah and I was introduced to the joys of Xyron.   like I need another gadget....

Earthquakes and Tsunamis and Squids oh My

I lived in Japan from  2000-2003.   on 9/11, when the base was on lockdown, the amount of  support in the form of flowers and candles and vigils outside the gates was overwhelming.  they are a wonderful people, quiet, reserved(unless its Karaoke Night)  and truly caring.

 both my husband and my stepson are involved with the relief efforts currently.   this is one of those times where you not only understand on a far deeper level why you won't be hearing from your loved ones as often,  but you also don't mind at all that it could be weeks before you speak again.

things like natural disasters, whether they hit close to home physically or emotionally, tend to make you step back and take stock.   all those little things like potable water and electricity to power the Laptop suddenly aren't so little any more.  Things we take for granted like  the roads..and the cell phone tower.. you gain a new appreciation.  even something as simple as having a blanket at night  becomes far more than mere necessity.

We have it lucky.   far luckier than most other nations.   we need to start appreciating that fact more.

Taxes: Ugh

now don't get me wrong, I fully expect a refund, and probably a large enough one to cover the June trip.  or pay off  my student Loans  even earlier than the current December Timetable.

But all those reports and documents you get (hopefully in a timely fashion after 30 January)?  It's a bear to keep track of the IRAs and the Mutual Funds and the Mortgage interest payments and the interest income from the savings account.  especially since  many places have opted to go paperless.. or at least to just email you a link to their website so you can waste your own paper and ink printing it out.

 which only helps if you actually HAVE ink in your printer.   or , more precisely, Black ink.   *sigh*.  It's always something.

 stuff you seldom use, but when you actually need it, it's not there.  Like black ink for your printer so you can print out tax info.  or batteries that fit into various and sundry household goods.. like..oh I dunno, the thermostat.   or the Elliptical machine.  or the smoke detector that chooses 0200 to remind you that it's there and needs a recharge.  stuff that you don't necessarily have stockpiled in the closet.  but when it goes, you need it replaced Right.Now.

  John has been officially gone  a year this week.   and Last Christmas seems like forever ago.  and June is Forever away.

I miss my Squid....

Spring is coming; let the doldrums be banished

 Plotting and planning for  June has begun.   Hotel ressies made, Plane tickets( for each of us) are bought.   all I need now is to figure out the least complicated way to rent a wheelchair for the trip.

I absolutely will need one for San Diego,  there is no way I could survive 2 days each at the Zoo and WAP( now called safari Park) and squeeze in a trip to Seaworld while we are at it.  I could admit that its my own fault due to lack of exercise, but that's not entirely true.   I really am in a bad way.   my hips just can't take the strain any more.  the local post office is about a 20 minute walkaway, and when I go there, I am done for the rest of the day, even factoring in  my usual routine of sitting down at one of the nearby eateries( I have a bounty to choose from,. Hardee's. KFC, Friendly's, even Five Guys if I really needed 5 pounds of deep fried goodness in a paper bag) all on the way.  and heck, the route ..is flat!

Guess i really am old and will need to seriously revisit the doc's recommendation to  get a referral to an Ortho surgeon.   Oh, Joy.   Next year, when John gets back from Okinawa.

But that is tabled for the nonce.   first I need to make reservations at a few sit down places in Disneyland.   Thinking Napa Rose and ESPN Zone.  one romantic and one casual.   works for me.

Just need to get through the next 3 months.   if the snow is REALLY doen for the year, it will be a start.. a good one.. to ensure my survival.

Ten bucks says when he returns in Spring 2012 means for the next three years after that there will be NO significant snowfall accumulation.

Better Late than never: Birthday Cards!

Okay so this is hard to admit but I am not that tech savvy, and the Mac photo app isn't quite as intuitive as the other programs I have had.. as I am having the damndest time finding simple commands like delete for all my extra super fuzzy pictures.   so that's why my blog won;t have  large copious  amounts of entries brimming with picturey goodness.   hell the other day I tried to  take out the  card formt he camera, stick in in the Mac slot.. yeah, took ten minutes to get the stupid thing out, then promptly misplaced the battery( which must be removed first) and then for the life of me could not  get the bloody thing to actually  enter the slot on the Mac.  yay for external USB connectivity....

 so without further ado, just a bunch of cards my Meade Gang pals sent me:

 

 yes lots of creativity there.   and I have no idea why the top one won't show up..  shows up just fine in my album.. honest...

Maybe next time you'll get some  of my latest creations.. which admittedly have not been nearly as many as I should be doing.. or  have been.

 Confession Time: been seriously depressed.  And I am ashamed to admit that as I tend to be REALLY hard on those whiny wives that  do nothing but lament how haaaaaaaard it all is cuz their DH had to work overnight.  or the ones that  throw conniption fits because their BF in Bagram didn't call her when he said he would.   and Mine  isn't even IN a combat zone.   we talk daily for at least an hour over IM and Skype when necessary.   and we both agreed way back when that we would not  try and get the orders changed or shortened.  I am the biggest Hypocrite out there.  This June trip is the only thing keeping me going, and yet all it is doing is keeping me from sliding down even further into funkdom.  Not even the last few days of 60 plus degree weather is helping.

and although officially the Leave hasn't been approved yet( OPS went  to do so the other day and of course the computer system went down.. John and I plotted our itinerary and meals for DisneyLand at least( we will pretty much wing it in san Diego except for a MUST DO trip to Rock Bottom...mmmm steak stuffed with bleu cheese and garlic, how I miss thee.

Oh well,  maybe someday I will quit feeling sorry for myself....

Warning: Sappy Romantic Crap ahead

Apparently my husband  forgot about our little unofficial  arrangement.   you know, the whole  No Flowers thing.  I Forgive him.

Oh yeah.  and we made hotel reservations for a week in LA and San Diego in June.  we decided that flying in to LA then driving the 2 hours to San dawg for the first half was smarter.   this way we spend a few days down there, hit the Zoo and  Safari Park( aka Wild Animal Park) as well as Sea World then drive back up and spend the last 2 days at Disneyland.    this way we aren't paying ridiculous return fees on the rental car.

of course  this assumes he will get his leave approved...